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Engaged couples have two important financial decisions to make
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Getting married is one of the biggest milestones in most people’s lives. It often represents a spiritual and legal union between two individuals. However, not all marriages are perfect. Many relationships are destroyed by lack of communication or a simple misunderstanding. To achieve marital happiness, there are several things you should talk about before saying “yes”.
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GOBankingRates asked divorce attorney Duane Coker what conversations prospective spouses should have before getting married. Coker is certified by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization in Family Law and is the founding shareholder of Coker, Robb & Cannon, family lawyersa boutique law firm with offices in Denton, Frisco and Fort Worth, Texas.
Here are the two things he told engaged couples need to discuss before getting married.
Future family plans
When asked what engaged couples should talk about before their wedding, Coker said, “As a family law firm specializing in divorce, we often see the results of what happens when potential spouses don’t discuss certain issues before marriage. While there can be many reasons for divorce, two topics seem to come up frequently when talking to unhappy spouses.
“First, a lack of discussion about future family plans often causes difficulties after marriage. It’s important to talk about whether or not spouses want children. If you plan to have children, another important discussion is how many and at what time.
“For example, some people want children very quickly after marriage, especially if they are getting married later,” he said. “Other people have parameters in mind, like a certain amount of time or waiting until spouses reach a certain level of financial security. Being on the same page about children is important, especially because there can be a biological clock that can increase stress for one or both parties.”
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How finances and property should be managed
According to a GOBankingRates survey, more than 19% of couples admit that they sometimes argue about financial issues and almost 13% responded that they argue frequently about the subject.
Coker explained, “Discussing how each spouse thinks their finances and property should be managed after marriage is extremely important. Financial issues are one of the top causes of friction we hear about when discussing a potential divorce with clients.
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“Potential spouses should talk about how they intend to manage and share assets and income after marriage. Whether or not you live in a community property state like Texas, you need to discuss whether the state’s standard laws are consistent with your plans.
“If they are not, or if the parties are unsure about how they want things to be managed in the future, then they should have a detailed discussion with a family lawyer to determine whether a prenuptial or prenuptial agreement may be appropriate for them. they.”
Why Consider a Prenuptial Agreement
“Although prenuptial agreements can be difficult pre-marital discussions, as no one wants to think about the possibility of divorce before they have even taken their wedding vows, these agreements can often eliminate a lot of stress and uncertainty, or the perceived unfairness of standard family laws. and help spouses avoid one of the most common reasons for divorce,” said Coker.
“Most states now allow detailed prenuptial agreements and allow parties to establish exactly how they want their assets and income to be handled during the marriage, providing an outcome during the marriage that aligns with the spouse’s goals and desires.”
While open and honest communication may not guarantee a successful marriage, it definitely helps provide a solid foundation for a marriage. Topics such as how many children you want, where you want to live and how you view money are essential to avoid conflicts in the future.
In these conversations, however, it is just as important to be honest with yourself as it is with your spouse. Don’t pretend to be a saver if you spend every dollar you have as soon as you get it. Don’t be fooled into thinking that it’s okay to not have children if you’ve always imagined a future with a house full of kids. Happy marriages are often built on trust, which requires real discussions about what you want, early and often.
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This article originally appeared on GOBankingRates. with: Divorce Lawyer: Engaged Couples Have Two Important Financial Decisions to Make