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‘I knew what I was doing was wrong’: Shopaholic reveals how she got into £40,000 debt
Per Emily Meenews reporter
When Maddy Alexander-Grout went to university, she didn’t realize she had a spending habit with undiagnosed ADHD.
Alone in the big wide world for the first time, she soon discovered that she had a “burning hole in my pocket” and that she would “spend and spend and spend.”
Using credit cards, overdrafts, store cards, and even a university scholarship, she spent her money on things she didn’t need, like clothes, shoes, CDs, and books.
Before long, she was £40,000 in debt – and in the third part of our Psychology of Shopping series, we hear her story.
Maddy says she didn’t tell anyone about her out-of-control spending.
“I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I was very ashamed of the fact that I was spending money all the time,” she says.
Only her housemates knew she was struggling because she couldn’t pay her bills, but even they didn’t know the true extent of her debt and Maddy found herself “hiding” from them because she owed them money.
Miles from home and feeling alone, Maddy stopped talking to her parents for a long time because she felt “embarrassed” and didn’t want them to “bear the burden of having to bail me out.”
Meanwhile, his spending spree continued.
Maddy explains that a lot of this was born out of wanting people to like her – she thought if she had the latest clothes and went out drinking, she would be popular.
But she would wake up hungover from a night out and “spiral”, then go out and buy more clothes.
When the debt became too much, she stopped opening her post and moved to a different city in an attempt to escape it.
It even got to the point where a bailiff showed up at her house, which she described as a “horrible situation.”
In desperation, she turned to the Citizens Advice Bureau, who told her she would have to go bankrupt – an idea that only filled her with “more shame”.
It was then that Maddy decided to finally sort things out.
Citizens Advice told her about the 50-30-20 rule – where you spend 50% of your income on rent and daily bills, 30% on wants and needs, and 20% on debt.
Given that it would still take her around 60 years to pay off her debt this way, Maddy says she instead adopted her own 50-10-40 rule – which gave her just 10% of her income for food and socializing.
She lived on just £15 a week worth of food, so learned to only buy yellow stickers at the supermarket, which would lead to some “random” meals.
“I discovered that I love canned tomatoes on toast and cheese, so I lived on that solidly for about two years,” says Maddy.
Now, Maddy has launched an app called Crazy about money to help others – especially those who are neurodivergent – achieve their financial and wellness goals.
She says if she had learned about money from a young age, she would have realized the “huge consequences” of her spending.
“The reason I set up the app is to give people that education and a community of support – if they don’t want to talk to their friends, they can come and talk to people who are in similar situations so everyone can cheer each other on. “, she says.
“If other people had told me that we’re in the same position, we’re doing the same thing, I wouldn’t have felt so ashamed of it.”
Looking back at what happened to her, she says it’s “part of my story, so I don’t regret it” and it taught her a lot, although she regrets putting her parents through stress and not talking to them. before.
She now talks openly with her children about money so they can make more informed decisions.
As for the willingness to spend money to make people like her?
“I have a lot of friends now – I go jogging half the time and they don’t mind,” she laughs.
Join us tomorrow as we conclude this series with a look at the tactics big brands use to get you to spend more